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was inoperable, and he died six months
?d clean out Gil?s office
ago. Ray said he f or me. I j ust f i gured he
was trying to get back on my good side."
?t change what Ray does with Gil?s work. But I won?t
"We can
give him ?s
m work to steal in the future." Sara shoves Chambers
manuscript to the ?ve decided
ot her si de of t he t abl e. "Or now. I
not to present my paper in the
?t give her ?
I f eel very l i ght headed. I know she doesn paper, but
"Why not?" I ask
"Whi l e I was readi ng the manuscri pt thi s afternoon, I heard that fat
sheriff interviewed on the radio. They arrested 90 people at Hazel
last night, Carol, people like us. People who only wanted to dance
with each other. But he kept bragging about how they cleaned out a
?in a blinding moment of clarity?
nest of perverts. And I real i zed
that the university
i s a branch of t he st at e, and t he sheri f f i s
?s laws. I?m working for people who ?
enforci ng the state bel i eve i t
s morally right to abuse you?or me?or Jimmy. And I can?t do
that any
"Here, here!" Jimmy says, smiling. "The only problem is, as I
expl ai ned t o her t hi s morni ng, t he admi ni st rat i on i s l i kel y t o t ake a
very dim view of being embarrassed in front of every major physicist
?s research is
i n the country. Not to menti on they feel Sara
university property." He looks at me and
t akes a si p of t ea. "So
we decided it might be best if Sara disappeared for a while."
I stare at both of them, my mouth open. I have that same odd feeling
of dej a vu t hat I di d i n t he car l ast ni ght .
?ve cleaned everything that?s hers out our office and the
" I
?s all in the trunk of my car.
l ab," Ji mmy says. "It "
"And those," Sara says, gesturi ng to the boxes i n the corner, "are
what I value from my desk and my library here. Other than my Nana
teapot ?s all I?ll really need for a while.
and some clothes, it
Jimmy?s family has a ?t
vacation home out in West Marin, so I won
have to worry about rent?or
pri vacy. "
?m still staring. "What about your career?
I "
Sara puts down her teacup with a bang and begins pacing the floor.
?m not giving up my
"Oh, bugger my career. I work, j ust t he
?and its hypocrisy. If one of my colleagues had a
uni versi ty
little fling, ?m
nothing much would come of it. But as a woman, I
supposed to be some sort of
paragon of unsul l i ed Vi ctori an vi rtue.
?career? in jeopardy
Just by being i n t hat bar l ast ni ght , I put my
?d crucify me if they knew who?or ?I am. I don?t want
. They what
to live that way any more."
She brings the teapot to the table and sits down, pouring us each
?s why I had to ask about
another cup. "End of ti rade. But that
your money. ?s enough to live on
I t for a good l ong whi l e, and to
buy al l the equi pment I need. In a few months, wi th a decent l ab, I
should be this close," she says, holding her thumb and forefinger
t oget her, "t o t i me t ravel i n pract i ce as wel l as i n t heory. And t hat
?ours. Not the university?s. Not
discovery will be mine the
government "
?ll stay down here and finish this term. That way
Jimmy nods. "I
I can keep tabs on things and order equipment without arousing
?t they come looking for you?" I ask Sara. I feel very
surreal. Part of me has always wanted to know why thi s al l happened,
?m just prompting the part I know
and part of me f eel s l i ke I
comes next
?s no reason to look," Jimmy says. ?ll
"Not i f t hey t hi nk t here "We
take my car back to Hazel?s and pick up hers. Devil?s
Sl i de i s
onl y a few mi l es up the road. It
?s a rainy night," I finish. "Treacherous stretch of
" I t highway.
?ll find Sara?s car in the
Accidents happen there all the time. They
morning, but no body. Washed out to sea. Everyone will think it
tragic th
at she di ed so young, " I say sof t l y. My t hroat i s t i ght and
?m fighting back
I tears. "At l east I al ways have. "
They both stare at me. Sara gets up and stands behind me, wrapping her
arms around my shoulders. "So that i s how it happens?" she asks,
?ve assumed I?d be dead in the
hugging me tight. "All along you
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